William P Young: The Shack: Thoughts on Marriage

The Shack, by William P Young, is the story of a man's relationship with God - Father, Son, and Holy Spirit.  The trigger for the man's dialogue with God is the tragic abduction of his daughter, but don't let the grim opening put you off.  This slim book is packed full of hope, surprising joy, and boundless, heart-changing love, all presented through the man's dialogue with the visible, present, communicative, loving, Tri-une God.

I bought this book some years ago, and have re-read it a few times.  Each time I read it, different thoughts linger in the days that follow:

• responsiveness (verb, active, bringing life to relationship) versus responsibility (noun, bringing legalism and death to relationship);
• expectancy versus expectation;
• Jesus: fully God, yet limiting himself to be like us;
• human free will, and our desire for independence and to judge others;
• the goodness of God;

and many more.

Recently, I picked it up again, and the thoughts that lingered this time were about marriage:

• God's intention was for both men and women to be satisfied completely by relationship with God
• relationship between men and women was fundamentally corrupted in the Garden of Eden
• men turned to the work of their hands, and women turned to relationship with men, to fill the need for wholeness that only God could satisfy.
• to heal our broken relationships, men and women need to "re-turn" to God for fulfillment before we can relate to each other in love, rather than brokenness.

What would this look like in a marriage? I have a visiion of a woman who daily turns to God to meet her need for approval, for love, for talk (!), for provision, for security, and everything else she needs... and then is able to serve and love her husband out of her fullness, rather than her brokenness. 

How could our marriages change if we were secure enough in God's approval, that we do not need to push and nag for 'our right' to domestic help, but were content to serve our husbands?  If we were so filled with God's love, that we need not manipulate our husbands into demonstrating their love, but were daily seeking ways to demonstrate our love?  If we were so convinced of our value to God, that we were able to use respectful words and actions, regardless of how our husbands treated us? If we were able to respond with love, peace, and joy in every and all marital conflict?

I pray for myself that these ideas would not remain seeds, but would take root and bear fruit in my life.