Chore Training for School-Aged Children

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Today, I am continuing my series by detailing the methods I use for chore-training my school-aged children. (If you are interested in other age groups, you may wish to read the earlier posts in this series, Chore Training for Toddlers and Chore Training for Preschoolers). 

In this age group, I use chore training to focus on timeliness, responsibility, and attitude.

Timeliness

As my children become competent and independent at their chores, I start to require that they are done in a timely manner. This is especially critical at this age group, because of the time constraints imposed by formal schooling, but it is a process which can take years for some children.

When I first begin to require timeliness, I play a game of “let’s beat the microwave beeper!” to help the child comprehend what it feels like to complete the chore in a timely manner. I continue to use the beeper to indicate the end of one phase and the beginning of the next (such as transition from breakfast to ablutions), or to warn a child who is running late. For example, I often give a child a 2 minute warning and set the beeper, if they are falling behind on their tasks.

Responsibility

Chores are a great way of training responsibility, that is, the character quality of willingly choosing to do one’s duty without supervision. The main methods I use are :

• positive and negative consequences - I build in some free time for a fun activity into the before-school schedule, which is the child’s motivation and reward for completing their tasks by a set time. If they miss the deadline, they miss the fun activity. I also discipline for poor attitude (see following)
• visual aids - depending on the age and maturity of the child, I use one or more of the following aids: picture chore cards which the child can flip over (my favourites are ones in which I have a photo of the child doing the task); sticker charts; and chore run-sheets (for children who can read) which indicate each chore, the approximate time it should start, and the approximate time it should take to complete.

Attitude

My standard for chore training includes the child starting the chore willingly, cheerfully, and working on it to the best of their ability until it is complete. We do not always achieve this standard!!! Generally, by this age, my children are reasonably compliant (ie do not outright refuse the task), but poor attitude is occasionally displayed in body language, delay, verbal complaint, or distraction.

Training for good attitude is not complicated, but it is time-consuming and requires commitment. Encouragement and praise are two powerful motivators which are easily forgotten when time is running short. Warning, correction, and negative consequences are also needed if the child is displaying a poor attitude.

Learning New Tasks

When my children are in full-time school, I do not attempt to teach new tasks (including chores) during term. This is the method I use for teach new tasks during school holidays:

• plan ahead - draw up a list of tasks or chores my child needs to learn or revise. Be mindful of how long the holidays are and any other commitments you have. For a 2 week break which includes 2 birthdays, for example, I may only wish to include 1 new task.
• Work out whether I wish to focus on teaching one task at time, or alternate teaching different tasks on different days.
• Block out occasions in my family schedule where I will have one-on-one time with my child.
• Aim to achieve competence in the task(s) by the end of the holiday

Finally, I consider whether I wish the child to take responsibility for the new task in the new school term.   If so, I determine whether I need to drop an existing task, and if so, who will take responsibility for it.

Sample Chores for School Aged-Children

• all of the Preschooler Sample Chores
• packing and unpacking school bag (age 5 and up)
• brushing teeth and hair (age 6.5 and up)
• tying shoelaces (age 6.5 and up)
• feeding pets (age 6 and up)
• homework
• tidying their own room
• taking down dry laundry from the line
• carrying laundry baskets
• putting groceries away
• loading dishwasher with dirty tableware
• hand-washing dirty tableware

Note: I am by NO MEANS claiming that I am an expert in training school-aged children!! My oldest child is in Year 2, and my middle child is in part-time kindergarten, and both are in private school.  I have no practical experience in training children older than this, or in chore-training within any other context (eg home-schooling). I am aware that a case study of two does not make me an expert!!! I am also a very fallible human being, and frequently fall short of the peaceful, self-controlled mother I would like to be. 

What are your priorities when training school-aged children to do chores? Do you have experience with children older than mine? I’d love to hear from you!